The Method To End Power Struggles
Sometimes children seem to intentionally, and often very cleverly, contrive to take our power. Particularly when they reach around the age of 13 they seem to have figured out exactly what to say and how to say to make us feel powerless, flustered and out of control.
It's then that we get to see what is going on inside of us, and if we take that inner look we take back our power and no longer engage in a pointless, unproductive, and negative struggle to take power from the child.
I recall when my oldest was around five years old, I told him to do something and he said, "I don't have to do what you tell me," and I had to admit the truth of that statement. Our children DON'T have to do what we tell them.
What causes the child to defy our authority, though, goes beyond the mere fact that they can. In life the best that we can do to direct our circumstances is to align our full power with what we intend to accomplish.
When we align our full power with accomplishing what is truly most important to us our lives reflect that with order. Things fall into place in line with our priorities. What doesn't fall into place doesn't matter.
When your child refuses to put on her coat despite the frigid weather, refuses to stay out of the kitchen in bare feet despite the glass you just broke, shouts loudly in the restaurant despite your attempts to shush him, says mean and harmful things to his sibling despite your pleas to stop, what happens inside you?
Do you descend into feelings of fear, embarassment, humiliation, powerlessness, rage, overwhelm? Do you automatically continue struggling to get control despite mounting feelings of stress, strain and drain ?
Those reactions are impediments to your power, not effective applications of it.
The way that you react to not getting your way with your child teaches your child how to react when he doesn't get his way in life. When you crumble internally or have a melt down, he is learning to crumble or have a melt down in the face of life's challenges.
The greatest gift you can teach your child is how to take full advantage of all the power that she has, to utilize it for the full benefit of herself and others. You have the perfect opportunity to teach this lesson when you find yourself getting caught up in a power struggle with your child.
By using The Method to free your power from your negative internal emotional reactions you can then direct that freed up power in line with whatever you truly intend to happen.
When you are using your power correctly, for your full advantage, there is absolutely no sense of struggle, no sense of resistance, no sense of conflict or opposition. There is no frustration, only joy - the joy of inspiration because you see your breakthrough and you are seizing it.
As you make better use of your power by freeing from negativity through The Method you will find every area of your life falling into place, demonstrating more order as things flow smoothly and virtually effortlessly for you, including your child's behvior.
Contact me to schedule your demonstration of The Method For Parenting to improve your relationship and results with your child.